The one who asks questions doesn’t lose his way.
~ African Proverb ~
More than likely, you grew up thinking if you do the right things (went on a diet), you would have what you desired (a body weighing 120 pounds) and you would be the person you dreamed you’d become: (healthy, thin, happy, fun, loving, self-confident, empowered, etc).
Unfortunately, it is not a simple equation of do equals desired result. You are living proof that doing the so called right things don’t always lead to the coveted prize. Most of us work from a do-have-be mindset described in the first paragraph and what we have learned over the years is it simply doesn’t work.
I challenge you to shift your thinking by changing the order and embrace a be-do-have mindset.
Here’s how it works: Be a person who makes healthy choices. Ask yourself – How would a thin, happy, fun, loving, self-confident and empowered person be?
Next, do those things a healthy, thin, happy, fun, loving, self-confident, empowered person does. Embrace those qualities and attributes. Would that person sit on the couch snacking on processed foods, or would she go for a walk, ride her bike, choose real healthy foods, meditate?
Finally, after you be like the person you want to become, and do things that person does, you will magically have a life like the person you envisioned. By first being, your behaviors will modify to match, manifesting a new life by changing how you think and act.
Here’s the caveat: This work ain’t easy.
If continuing to believe simply by doing the right things the results you want will be yours, then it is highly likely lasting results will be elusive.
It’s time to shift your thinking. Switch your processes. Change your destiny.
BE the person you would be if you had already reached your goal. Then, DO the things a successful person would do. These changes will allow you to HAVE exactly what you want.
This process is called acting as if. When behaving, or acting, as if you already are the person you want to be, you become the person you want to be.
Like magic.
Take a moment to close your eyes and envision what that looks like for you.
How would you carry yourself? What would be your focus? How would you treat yourself? How would you treat others?
Begin today to act, to live; to be the person you would be if you had already achieved your goal. Start being the new you NOW!
Wake Up to the Possibilities!
Here is your mission, should you decide to accept it: Set aside a small chunk of uninterrupted or distracted time (15 minutes or so). Then, get ready to write.
Before beginning to write, take five minutes to sit with yourself. Be quiet, breathe, center, and relax.
In your journal, start writing (there is no right or wrong way to do this). One way would be to answer the following questions.
Who (or what) do you want to BE? This will include:
- How do you want to FEEL?
- How do you SHOW UP in your life?
- What’s your MISSION?
- What are your STRONGEST traits?
Write in the present tense, as if they have already happened.
Here are a few examples from my journal:
I AM a powerful woman who brings joy to my clients! I AM healthy! I AM confident! I bring joy and happiness to my friends! I AM a van-dweller! I AM a traveler!
What do you want to DO?
- What are your desires?
- Do you want to travel the world?
- Do you want to be a nomad?
- Do you want to sing?
- Do you want to play the guitar?
- Do you want to take belly dancing lessons?
Don’t limit yourself. Let your imagination run free. In this exercise all things are possible!
What do you want to HAVE? This one often stumps people. Some may feel a little greedy or selfish listing their desires. This is just an exercise. It serves to clarify all the possibilities available in your lifetime.
It can be as simple as, MORE FREE TIME! Or it can be big dreams, such as; I want a house on the beach! With the excess pounds lost, you might want a whole new wardrobe. Let the process take you places! Play with the possibilities.
Keep these things in mind:
- Do it YOUR way. There is no right or wrong. The more details you provide the better the results.
- Be specific. Confusion never got anyone anywhere. Be clear, concise and detailed.
- Listen to the voices which may pop up, hear them, acknowledge them, but do not obey them. They might say you are selfish. But remember, being selfish is good. Put your Self in the center of your life. Until you take care of yourself, your body will suffer.
You have a RIGHT to be happy. Don’t let anyone tell you differently (especially those mean voices in your head).
One way to tackle this is to divide your life into segments and work at it from that perspective. Such as; Relationships; Parenting; Money; Work; Health; etc.
Dream big. Act as if there is no way to fail.
Feel the fear, and then do it anyway. Do it scared.
Most of all have fun!